Your Words, Part 1: Speaking Your Own Reality

There is a whole lot of truth to the adage that actions speak louder than words. They do. But that doesn’t mean that your words don’t carry a lot of weight. What you speak matters. Your words are based on your thoughts and your thoughts and words determine your actions.

Recently, I was challenged to change some of the words I use. I was challenged to ‘speak words of victory’ because although I try to be positive, in some areas of my life, it’s habitual to speak words of defeat.

I talk about what ‘will never happen’ for me and what seems ‘a million miles away.’ The truth of the matter is that whatever we do, there is a reason and usually a benefit for it. In my distorted way of thinking, if I spoke negatively about the things I want most, and then I won’t be disappointed when they don’t come to pass.

When I stopped and really gave it some thought, when I speak negatively, I am creating that reality for myself. I am living the disappointment in that instant, in that moment. More than anything, I am making it real. It’s no wonder that those words had become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Funny, the areas where I tended to speak more positively – training, coaching, friends, my writing – I tend to have had more success. However, the areas where I had tended to focus on defeat – finance and romance – I’ve experienced the least amount of success.

As soon as I began to speak differently about those things I noticed several changes. First, I didn’t feel as bad about them. I stopped feeling hopeless and began to feel like I was in control. I felt like I could have success. Second, I began to feel good about situation. I started to feel as if financial and romantic success were real possibilities for me.

My words changed. My thoughts changed and then, my actions changed. I've started acting in ways that aremore aligned with romantic and financial success. Are things perfect? No. But they are much better and getting better with every passing day.