Monday, February 18, 2013

Failure Recovery: Disaster Dissection – What the Heck Went Wrong?

Every Monday in February, this four-week series covers a four step process for getting back up after you’ve fallen down.

You’ve felt your feelings and owned your mistakes. Now, it is time to move beyond the pain and embarrassment. You had a plan and somewhere along the way, it fell apart. The whole thing could have imploded or one step could have thrown you off course. Whatever happened, in Step Three you have to investigate and discover the root cause of your mistake(s).

Start by asking one question: “What happened?” It could appear that the answer is an easy one. “I gave in to temptation and ate the candy bar.” “I got sick and slept a lot. After I got better, it was easier to just sleep than to get up and exercise.” “I jumped to conclusions and constantly accused my significant other of lying and cheating.”

However, nothing is ever that easy. After you’ve asked what happened, ask yourself, “How did I let that happen?” Why did you let yourself give in to temptation? It could have been a reaction to stress. The social pressures of friends at a Girls’ Night Out could have added to the temptation. What stopped you from resuming your exercise routine after your illness had run its course? Maybe at first, all your workout clothes needed to be washed, or you were still a little tired and not ready to restart at 100%. If your significant other had cheated and lied in the past and you had good reason to be distrustful.
  • Ask yourself the following questions:
  • What parts of my plan or situation were working?
  • What could I have done differently?
  • Who could I have gone to for support?
  • Is there anyone enabling or sabotaging me?
  • What were my thoughts and negative self-talk saying to me when I made my mistake?
The last question you want to ask after you have assessed the situation. What will you do differently next time? This is where you uncovered the lessons you have learned from your mistake and where you begin to plan your recovery. However, you can’t get to this question until you have processed all of the ones that come before it.

NEXT MONDAY:  Planning your recovery

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